Sunday, August 07, 2011

Sunday Supplement Advertising: Envy is Pink on Deer Leases This Season.

I’m having a hard time with the Academy Sports + Outdoor “Hunter’s Headquarters” supplement today…putting that pink pistol under the headline STOCK UP FOR HUNTING SEASON. On the other hand…
“Dang,” Big George Ardmore pronounces to Boy-John Jones when he finally gets up to the top of the deer stand. “I do not recall ever seein’ you or anyone else I know carry a pink gun on this deer lease.”

Boy-John turns right into that. “Big George, this here is a Taurus PT 22 automatic pistol, which I have acquired for the everyday low price of $229.99 from the fine folks at Academy up in the big city.”

“That’s a mighty small hole in the front of that pee-sto-lay,” Buddy Rounds advises, sneaking in a comment from his seat on top of the beer cooler. “Still and all, that hot pink grip sure makes a statement.”

Boy-John is known for a bit of a temper but keeps his feeling damped right down. “I’ll have you know that this ain’t pink. It’s rasberry – said so right in the sales flyer.”

“Yeah, well, I saw that flyer too,” Buddy says. “First off, they done misspelled ‘rasberry.’ They’s a ‘p’ in that word and the advertiser left it out. Second pretty important point – the flyer says it’s Caliber .45 ACP which is plain wrong.”

Buddy reaches into the cooler for an early-AM beer and hands another over to Big George. “And finally, you coulda got that same firearm from Shermbob’s Guns in Pennsylvania for just $190 plus shipping.”

Without one more word, Boy-John turns his back on his buddies, clambers down the ladder and wobbles his way over to the four-wheeler which he fires up and roars off on in the direction of the cabin.

Big George turns to Buddy and says, “I am sorry he got all heated up – I was just gonna tell him how well I thought that ‘rasberry’ pistol grip matched his Jimmy Choo whipstitch ankle boots today.”

That’s it for Sunday. Don’t forget to stock up for hunting season your own self: Jimmy Choo fashion footwear available at Neiman Marcus and Nordstrom.


JohnReeves said...

Who would spend $ 230 for a .22? You'd need a head shot to kill anybody in home defense.

Richard Laurence Baron said...

Not even one is "rasberry," John? As Buddy says, that grip does make a statement...